Twenty-four years of 3-D bliss

Today is the 24th anniversary of my and Dee’s marriage. This story from the New York Times, by way of News of the Weird (you’ll see why in a moment) reminded me of that event:

Lonely Japanese men (and a few women) with rich imaginations have created a thriving subculture (“otaku”) in which they have all-consuming relationships with figurines that are based on popular anime characters. “The less extreme,” reported a New York Times writer in July, obsessively collect the dolls. The hardcore otaku “actually believes that a lumpy pillow with a drawing of a (teenage character) is his girlfriend,” and takes her out in public on romantic dates. “She has really changed my life,” said “Nisan,” 37, referring to his gal, Nemutan. (The otaku dolls are not to be confused with the life-size, anatomically-correct dolls that other lonely men use for sex.) One forlorn “2-D” (so named for preferring relationships with two-dimensionals) said he would like to marry a real, 3-D woman, “(b)ut look at me. How can someone who carries this (doll) around get married?” [New York Times Magazine, 7-26-09]

I’m thankful that my doll isn’t the 2-D type that makes people look at you weird if you have a public (or any kind of) relationship with it. My doll is the 3-D type that the 2-D desperate weirdo’s wish they had. Dee’s been a wonderful 3-D partner and wife for these 24 years. Maybe I’ve been an ok 3-D husband, too (think Mr. Miyagi: “You pretty okay too.”) . I supposed she’d admit to that just for one day, since it’s sort of a special day. Maybe tomorrow I’ll make Dee mad and she’ll wish I was 2-D and she could just crumple me up and toss me in the trash. But for today, we’ll enjoy the bliss of being 3-D’s together: Doug, Dee, and Do (as in, “I do”).